Innocence and Vulnerability

I was without my regular internet access for about a week and a half, ten days to be exact, and as you might imagine, this was quite hard for me! I had to find other ways to occupy my time, so I wrote and drew, I meditated, and watched movies and TV. I found stuff to do, but even so, I was still very dissatisfied. Now, you may be saying to yourself, “hold up Andre, it sounds like you kept busy, so it mustn’t have been that bad.” “I don’t mean to seem ungrateful,” I would respond, “but the internet gives me some amount of independence, and allows me to connect with a variety of people.” I felt very cut off from the world, HOWEVER, on to the main point of this post.

Image found on filmofilia.com

One of the movies that I watched during my stint of little internet, was the latest addition to the Spy Kids saga. Initially, I had no intention of watching it, but when my mum put more books on my Ipad, All the Time in the World was added too. I was bored one night, so I decided to watch it, and honestly, I’m glad I did! It’s not half-bad, and it reminded me to stop, breathe, and return to a more innocent way of being.

However, I am already somewhat naive, and that makes me feel vulnerable. Now, I know that being vulnerable is good sometimes, but it scares me. I have been fooled and hurt so many times. Though, I really need to distance myself from certain situations for a bit, to use my intuition to discern the reality of said situations. I’m thinking of a recent dilemma, involving Starkeeper. Regardless, I MUST REMEMBER TO DO THIS, especially if I want to get out into the world, and live! 

After I watched the above video, on Monday, my goals, and desires to do more with my life, have moved to the front of my mind again. It’s funny, in a synchronistic kind of way that in this vid, Jordan talks about “stepping outside of yourself,” which just reaffirms the need to momentarily distance myself from certain situations.

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